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2012-09-06 - 7:33 p.m.

Testing out the camera on my new phone. Seems to work pretty good. This has not been retouched or cropped at all, just reduced in size to fit here.

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2012-09-01 - 8:28 p.m.
A big HELLO to anyone who tried to stop by my webcam site tonight. I've been having technical difficulties all day. At this point, I'm thinking that my router is dying, but it could still be something to do with the website. I'll try a couple more things to see if I can fix it tonight. If not, I'll be back on again next weekend.

But if you do happen to log on and see me, please let me know if there is sound...or if you can see me at all. Thanks!

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2012-08-26 - 5:56 p.m.
I posted this in the comments over at Cripes Suzette. But it is sooo telling about how most of my days go, that I thought I'd re~post it over here.

This is how my day goes (the things I REALLY worry about. LOL):

~Did I already take that pill?
~WHY are my eyelashes pointing down on my left eye?
~Does my right cheek look swollen to you?
~I think this mole is changing.
~Is this bump getting bigger?
~Do you ever get a pain,!?
~I sooo do not want to have to go to the dentist.
~I wonder if my insurance covers optical exams?
~I think my heart just skipped a beat.
~Will you feel my pulse…did you feel it???!
~Should we call 911?
~Is it too soon to take another pill?!?

Oh..sorry...So how was *your* day??

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2012-08-19 - 4:32 p.m.
I usually don't like to do sad posts here, but something happened this week that really moved me, and I think I need to write it down. But first, a little background:

Some of you know that I use a walker because I have a nerve disorder that makes me unsteady on my feet. Also, I broke my ankle a few months back and have been in physical therapy. A lot of people, mainly elderly, ask about my walker: where did I get it, how much did it cost, etc. The one I bought was super deluxe with big tires so that I could make it to the beach, and I tricked it out with lights, a bike basket, side compartments...the works! This isn't your grandma's does NOT have tennis ball shoes!

So as I was on my way to therapy, a young girl stopped me to ask about my walker. She was probably in her 20's, was on crutches, and was wearing a boot cast like I have for my broken ankle. She was clearly in pain.

She told me she had been in the boot and on crutches for THREE years! She had had surgeries removing a major artery and nerves in her leg. She started to get teary as she described to me the weird awful feelings in her leg and foot....extreme neuropathy, just like I have. She said it felt like her leg was full of bricks. It felt like pins and needles in her foot all the time.

I know these feelings all too well. It's super hard to describe, but I knew EXACTLY what she was talking about. I could totally relate.

She was so sad. She felt that she would never get well. Her total despair was so deep I could feel it weighing on me. Then out of the blue, almost like in a trance, she told me that she thought I was beautiful. I almost lost it.

I wish I could have spent a few more minutes with her. After she left, I thought of so many things I could have/should have said. But I wished her well and told her I would think good thoughts for her.

Then I got to therapy and they told me I was well enough now that this would be my last appointment. I wish that the poor girl had heard something as encouraging as that. But from the sound of it, she had been dropped in the system of no return....which is so typical if you are a member of Kaiser Permanente. I have been in this same loop, but keep pressing and pressing for help and answers. I fear that this poor young girl has given up because the system has given up on her.

I have never felt so much pain and despair coming from another person. The depth of her sadness is something I will think about for a long time.

Please think good thoughts for her.

So sad. I am weeping now.

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