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2005-10-11 - 5:02 p.m.
Being the lazy slush that I am, I find more and more that I am taking a day off for "Me." One time, it was because I had to do an epic 7 hour I needed a day for "Me." Then another time, I needed to go to the doctor....another day for "Me." Then again, it might have been a super frustrating day for whatever reason....another day for "Me." Another time, I found out that I had forgot to pay some bill and now had a penalty of a million percent interest.....another day for "Me."

But, I've realized that those "days for Me" are starting to add up. Yes, in the back of my mind, I could see this adding up....but I was in denial. And it's not that I have been taking days off's more that I've been allowing myself to indulge in "lazy slush" behavior. Drinking too much, not exercising enough, ignoring things that should not be ignored.

Celebrities check themselves into rehab when they feel like this. I prefer to recognize it in myself and rely on my friends and my psychopharmacologist to help me out of this. (And don't you just love the word " psychopharmacologist"?)

Tonight I will be trying Gabapentin (aka.....Neurontin) in addition to two other drugs that will hopefully help me with my anxiety.

Why am I telling you this? Well, it's just a document of what's going on with me right now. But also, I would love to hear from anyone who has experienced the same feelings or has taken some of the same medications: Prozac, Ativan, and Neurontin.

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2005-10-10 - 11:33 a.m.
Hey look.....I'm on the internet again!! And really, I haven't been ignoring you, I just haven't been able to get on. It all started last week when the cable company came out to hook up one of the new tenants, but managed to knock me off the system instead.

It took crashing both laptops twice, and rebooting the system head to toe three times (modem, router, etc.), to finally get back on the internet. Yay! Unfortunately, sometime during this process I became locked out of my own site. (I'm not sure if it was something I did or just a cooincidence.) Anyway, I emailed tech support, "Help! I'm locked out!" A day goes by, no response. Then I try the trick of pretending I forgot my password. Luckily they have an auto-responder on that, so I got my password immediately. Still, I can't get in! Finally, the next day, I try one last time.....and Woo Hoo! I'm in!!

So that was Saturday night when I finally got all that fixed. (I still have no idea what that was about.) But by then I was too fed up with the whole thing to post something entertaining so I went down to the bar instead. Now that may have sounded like a good idea at the time, but I forgot to take into account the "hang over" effect.

The "hang over" effect took over, very effectively, I might add, Sunday morning when I was supposed to be preparing for an epic 7 hour long drive to San Francisco. Not good. I had planned to get up reasonably early so I could get there at a reasonably reasonable time. (Shocking I know, I never get up reasonably early!) But of course, a little hang over got in the way, and I slept until 11:30......didn't even hit the road till 2:45. So, you know, by the time I got here, I was in no spirit to post anything. It was martini time!!!

But I am today.....finally on the internet.....and I'm posting!

Now if I could just think of something interesting to say...............

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2005-10-02 - 9:41 p.m.

Wild fires can be devastating, but the sunset their smoke leaves behind can be amazing. This photo doesn't do it justice. Thankfully, only 2 houses were burned (out of over 20,000 acres burned) to make this picture. It could have been much much worse.

comments??? (3 so far...) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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