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AS SEEN ON

UNSCREWED

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My Art

100 THINGS about me

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Photos of Me

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2004-10-04 - 9:16 p.m.
So prior to the taping of the show, there was much discussion about how I would get naked, when it would happen, and how much of my undressing and nudity would actually be seen. Originally, I was going to be completely nude, and I would have actually preferred to do it that way (for me it's all or nothing!) But then they told me that for legal reasons, I was going to have to wear panties or at least a g-string.

The next issue was, how fast could I get out of my clothes. There was talk of having me do the interview either wearing a robe, or wearing just a g-string and pasties on my nipples. But I had an outfit all planned out (this had been a long ordeal too, finding the perfect thing to wear....so I wasn't going to give that up!).....fortunately, the outfit involved showing a lot of cleavage, and they loved that (it's all about ratings, you know.) But it finally came down to timing how fast I could get naked, and we had it timed down to 20 seconds.

But here's the thing....with the outfit I chose, I don't usually wear panties or anything under it.....so when I practiced my 20 second undress....I wasn't thinking about the fact that on TV, I would also be wearing a g-string. You probably had to have been there to completely understand how this worked, but as I was wiggling out of my clothes, I started taking off my g-string too.....which is something they absolutely did not want me to do! So instead of the graceful complete~wiggle~out~of~clothes that I had practiced, I ended up having to stop mid way to hike up my g-string. Oy. Fortunately, everyone giggled when I said, "Oops, I'm having a wardrobe malfunction!"

After that, they just wanted me to paint, and they kept telling me to do it quickly so that when they were done with the other guest, they could cut to me finishing the painting. But I got done way too soon, and the paint was drying on my breasts because of all the hot lights pointed at me. I kept having to dab on bits of paint, and drops of water to be ready for my next segment of the show! During this time, I was crouching behind part of the set with one of the camera men, and we kept wispering back and forth about what I should do next. Oddly, I didn't feel naked at all at this point.....and the camera man seemed like my best friend, but only because we seemed like co-conspirators, wispering and waiting for the next shot.

Most of everything else is a blur. It happend so fast. In the end, I made two paintings and one T-shirt, then I was wrapped up in a pink robe for a final little interview at the "bar" part of their set.....then I was ushered off to the shower and everyone disappeared! I was a bit suprised by how quickly the set dispersed and eveyone went home! (But I was kind of happy to be getting out of there too.)

After that, my Love and I went out to one of my most favorite restaurants to celebrate (Ivy at the Shore in Santa Monica).....then went home for a midnight walk on our beach where we saw the two women getting it on with strap-on dildos. I'm sure there were other things that happend that night, but I'll leave that up to your imagination.......

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2004-10-04 - 12:37 p.m.
Just a quick note: The TV show is going to be on October 11.....so you haven't missed anything yet except the live webcam of the taping of the show. Look for G4 TechTV on your local cable or satellite listings. The show I'm on is called Unscrewed with Martin Sargent, and it's usually on at 8:30pm and 11:30pm Pacific time.

Now stay tuned.....later today, I'll finish the post about getting naked.

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2004-10-02 - 10:20 p.m.
**I guess I should make a brief interlude here to explain what Unscrewed with Martin Sargen is all about (because a few of you have asked, but I don't know why.....since by now, you should all be glued to your TV sets watching it every night, and if it's not on, you should be begging your local cable company to put it on, and if they won't put it on.....you should be delving into the inner depths of the Unscrewed website to figure out what it's all about! But I digress.) The best description of the show would be to call it a cross between David Letterman and Howard Stern with a dash of Google thrown in.**

Now, back to our show!

So after they brought me the tequila, things started moving pretty fast. I don't completely remember the order of things because so many things were happening at the same time, and about half a dozen people were talking to me at once. There was much discussion about how and when I was going to get naked.

After that whole discussion, they shuffled me over to the makeup room. But when I got to the makeup person, she said, "You've done such a great job...you've done my job for me!" (I nearly fell over! Thank you, Makeuplady!) Then it was back to the Green Room to wait.....but only long enough to have one more sip (swig?) of tequila, then it was on to the set.

As I was waiting in the wings, I began to realize that this was it now, my fifteen minutes of fame, in front of a live studio audience, on TV.....naked. I was about to be a nervous wreck, but then Martin and Laura and the crew people came over one by one to say hi.....and they were all fabulous. They made me feel like I had done this a hundred times.....so I stopped being nervous.

Then finally, it was time for my segment. At the last minute, the microphone guy checked to see if I was on, then he grabbed my arm and away we went... practically running (maybe he was half dragging me) onto to the set.....and I sat down on the couch next to Laura. (At this point, I was still fully clothed.)

I remember being quite animated, not knowing where to look, hoping I would have funny and witty answers to his questions......but that's about all I remember about that part. I have no recollection of the questions. At the end of this segment, when they stopped for the commerial break, I do remember Martin telling me that I had done really well, and that he really liked my paintings.

Then the chaos began. I had to move from one part of the set to the next, set up all my paints and canvases.....and get naked.....gracefully.

(**Alright, this is getting to be a very long post, so it's time for my own commercial break....stay tuned for part 3, when I'll tell you all about my undressing!**)

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2004-09-30 - 11:48 p.m.
So maybe I should start from the beginning. About two months ago, out of the blue, TechTV contacted me about being on Unscrewed With Martin Sargent. I was afraid to talk about it too much until it was all on tape. But now it's all good....so here we go.

Of course, everything that could go wrong before the show, did. We jokingly questioned whether or not I would even be alive for the taping of the show. In the two months that I was waiting (preparing!) to be on the show, I had almost every malady possible. And even the very morning of the taping, I was getting aquainted with the toilet. (Stomach flu? Hangover? Nerves? All of the above?) Oy. But at 4:45pm I was miraculously in the car, on the way to the show.

When I got there, they took me to the *Green Room* where all the guests can relax (freak out!) before the show......and they asked me if I needed anything or if I would like anything to drink. I jokingly asked if they had martinis, and they very seriously said, "do you need alcohol? So I said....uh...well......yeah! I was only just being silly, but they said something like, "Of course! We'll go get you something." And then they came right back with a small bottle of tequila. I couldn't believe it!


(Now this is where I have to say *Stay tuned for part 2*......it was an unbelievable night. We even saw two women having sex with strap~on dildos at the ocean (not while we were on the show! but later that night.) I think I'm going to have to write this in at least two parts.......so stay tuned everyone!)

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2004-09-30 - 10:26 p.m.

I'm in there somewhere....

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2004-09-30 - 10:06 p.m.
New quote of the day:

"Well...I could just photoshop your leg off."

Stay tuned......any minute now I'll have the whole story up.

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